Solomon Kane

Starting with an impressive sequence that involves the assault on a foreign city and its strange castle, Solomon Kane wastes no time in getting into the action.
As Kane casually slaughters his way through guards, calling them foreign and pagan, you quickly get the impression that this is not a nice guy.
A creepy sequence involving mirrors and monsters leaves Kane alone in the throne room, but instead of treasure he finds himself face to face with the Devil’s Reaper – a suitably creepy monster – that tells him he’s going to be taken to hell, right now.
Kane escapes and renounces violence, going to live in a monastery.
When he is sent out from the monastery he encounters a Puritan family, after taking a severe beating by some bandits he refuses to fight, knowing the Devil will find him if he resorts to violence again.
Here the film takes a dip in pace. While we have sped along to this point there is a deliberate slow down as Kane learns about the family and the Puritan religion. With Pete Postlethwaite as the father, the story is never less than watchable, but I would have liked the pace to have been kept up.
When the villains finally appear and Kane renounces his renunciation of violence things start to move. The fights are brutal and violent, with Kane displaying a true talent for death dealing.
The story is quite strong and there are some fine performances from all concerned. James Purefoy makes a compelling lead, making a hero with a West Country accent seem like screen gold.
Yes, that’s right. Solomon Kane is from Somerset/Devon way and speaks like it.

While this character comes from the pen of the man who wrote Conan, the tones of this and the Arnie Conan films could not be more different.
While Conan shone with bright colours and the glory of being a warrior and a man, Kane is muddy and grey, just like the shades of morality that run throughout the film.
That is not to say the film isn’t visually interesting, because it most certainly is. Creature design and some wonderful sets give your eyes plenty to look at. Even the scenes in the woods manage to feel less than familiar, given how many fantasy movies take place in them.

Solomon Kane is a great slice of heroic fantasy and I would recommend it be seen. While it has probably gone from your local cinema by now, take a chance on it when it comes out for home viewing.

Dalton Quayle Rides Out by Paul Kane

This book contains two stories of the adventurer and detective Dalton Quayle, as written by his compatriot and partner, the gun loving Dr Pemberton.

The first story is Dalton Quayle’s Wet One.
The story is quite a good one, dealing with the rise of sea-people and a creepy sea-side town. Unfortunately I had a terrible time making my through this story and all due to the huge number of punnish names given to the characters. The town is called Outsmouth where locals drink Craftylove’s Ancient Irregular, anyone who has read a decent amount of horror should be able to pick up on the reference there. If that were all then it would have been a nice nod to his inspiration, but this story doesn’t read more like that. Instead it reads like an attempt to show you how many books and films the author has read/seen. There is a three page retelling of Robert Shaw’s monologue from Jaws after a scar comparison that is a pastiche of Moby Dick, complete with Captain Abrahab and the monster Dopy Mick. With characters such as Island Police Chief Bodey (who later on is referred to as Brodey in a typo), Jacques Custarde the underwater expert, Captain Codeye who exploited children for his brand of fish food, the list goes on. Which is a real shame, because when he’s not just playing on names and riffing on other peoples stories, Paul Kane is pretty funny. Towards the end of the story everything picks up and barring the occasional distracting pun is great fun.
The problem with all of the puns and plays on names you know is that they are continually dragging out of the story. As I say, when they are left behind the story is actually a good, fun read.

The second story, Dalton Quayle Rides Out, is much better. The pun names are mostly left out and when they occur, they are spread out to lessen the distraction.
In this story Quayle goes up against a Chinese Evildoer and genius called Fe-Man-Ho and his Mini-Fe, Fok-Yu. Going from the Chinese district out to the old west, this tale romps along a good pace, demonstrating the kind of humour Tom Holt praises him for in the introduction.
The verbal gags fly quite quickly and Pemberton and Quayle make entertaining heroes.

Overall this book is quite fun. While a humorous Sherlock Holmes type lead doesn’t seem all that original, the characterisation of Quayle makes him a character you’d be happy to read the other adventures Pemberton keeps referring back to.
I only wish that the number of puns and constant references to other books and films was toned down in the first story. For me they aggravated me as I was constantly being reminded of who the characters were based on and what particular film or story was being mocked.
But then, humour is very subjective and I’m not a huge fan of puns anyway. If you’ve found the names I’ve mentioned herein gave you a chuckle, then you may well enjoy this book.

You can order it from amazon.co.uk here

El Sombra by Al Ewing

Opening with the words:
The man walked across the desert.
And the desert destroyed the man.
is El Sombra, the second book in Abaddon’s Pax Brittania line.
The plot could be summed up as an unhinged Zorro fights Nazis to reclaim his town, but that would do a disservice to the outlandish imagination contained within the covers.
The origin of El Sombra is neatly delivered in a prologue where a wedding is interrupted by the arrival of flying Nazis and our hero descends into madness in the desert.
We then skip ahead 9 years, the people of the town are as nothing to their Nazi masters, viewed as little more than clockwork people, there to do their job, but not to live.
The best defined of the villains is Alexis, son of the commander, his introduction is reminiscent of Patrick Bateman in American Psycho, with all the references to male grooming products and the body in his bed.
It is not long before our hero arrives to stop a public execution and things just start going badly for the Nazis from here on.

One nice and inventive trick is that every Nazi killed by the hero is given a back story, some lasting only a paragraph others getting a full history. Some we feel sorry for, others less so, but each becomes a real character before being unceremoniously slain by the laughing El Sombra.
Only once does this not happen and there they are casually dismissed as chaff, not important enough to know beyond being in the way of El Sombra as he rages.

While there are no great surprises in how the plot progresses, this does not detract from the story in any way. The author bio describes it as his first penny dreadful and it reads as a great piece of pulp fiction.
The action is detailed and often entertainingly gory. There is a glee to be had at noting no two characters appear to die from the same wounds and guessing at just how El Sombra will dispatch the next.
There are some great set pieces, the highlight the attack of the ten foot tall clockwork, steam powered Nazi death robot, known as Der Zinnsoldat, the Tin Soldier.
There are suitably ironic ends for several villains, my personal favourite being the demise of the chief torturer in a new and inventive way that should bring a smile to your lips.

Never letting the story get bogged down in talk, El Sombra still manages to create a wide number of notable and memorable characters. This is a book I devoured in just under 24 hours and would recommend to any fans of slightly deranged pulp fiction.

The ending leaves it open for a follow up, but with the news that the originator of the series, Jonathan Green, will be writing all the further adventures in this world, we are unlikely to see it. A shame in my opinion.

Fruiting Bodies by Jonathan Green
Included in the book is a short story by Jonathan Green (creator of the Pax Brittania series), featuring his dandy hero, Ulysses Quicksilver.
Fruiting Bodies is set some months after the events in Unnatural History and has Ulysses investigating a strange death in the East End. A prostitute is found dead, her body covered with strange fungus.
The investigation leads him to noted botany experts and he stumbles upon other deaths.
The story is short, snappy and retains the fun of Unnatural History. Quicksilver is unable to stop charming any woman he comes across or upsetting Inspector Allardyce.

It’s a good piece of pulp fiction and it’s nice to see Abaddon putting a short story at the back rather than just the opening chapter of a novel.
The final revelation caught me slightly, which is always a nice surprise.
I am looking forward to the next book in the series. High standards have been set by all 3 stories so far, let’s hope they keep up.


You can buy El Sombra from amazon.co.uk here

Eulalia! By Brian Jacques

With this being the 18th book in the Redwall series, Jacques has settled into a comfortingly familiar style of story-telling.

For those who don’t know, the Redwall books are a cross between fantasy and medieval action/adventure stories with all of the characters being animals. Each type of animal has its own general personality, with the characters themselves being individuals. So rats, ferrets, weasels and other vermin type creatures are always the villains, roving bands of raiders or pirates. Moles are somewhat country-bumpkin like with their “boo-urr” speech patterns. Badgers are fierce warriors, otters are playful and good fighters. Hares are posh, stiff upper lip “what what” types who fight for the badger lords of Salamandastrom. My personal favourites have always been the GUOSIM – Guerrilla Union of Shrews in Mossflower. A bunch of homicidal, easily enraged shrews with rapiers.

This particular book doesn’t mess with the pattern of previous books, there are two major hero stories, we also follow the villains (2 bands of them this time) and Redwall Abbey is in danger. Like I said, it’s all very comfortable. However, I don’t read Redwall books for something new each time, just like I don’t expect an episode of CSI to turn into Battlestar Galactica and Jacques has become a master at these stories.
Each of our heroes are likable, this time a hedgehog taken in by the Abbey exiled for a season for stealing, or borrowing as he calls it. A hare called Mad Maudie, regimental cook and troublemaker, also sent away from her home of Salamandastrom on a quest.

The characters are well drawn, as I’ve come to expect from these books, and the author still has no qualms about calmly killing off one you’ve grown to like without remorse. It’s the constant sense that any of the characters could be killed that keeps it exciting.

This isn’t the strongest of the series, but it’s by no means weak. If this was your first Redwall book, I have no doubt that you would hunt down the others to read and enjoy. The story isn’t quite as dense as some of the previous ones and it felt a little rushed through to me. I’d have liked a few more events fro the heroes to battle through and the final battle doesn’t quite reach the heights of previous books.

This makes it just a solid entry to the series, without the truly memorable characters or deaths from some of the earlier books. Don’t let that put you off though, it still entertains and rattles along at a good pace. What more would you want from an adventure story for children?